The Bob Geldof Rant [03 Jun 2005|04:13pm] People such as Shona and I like to rant over certain matters, tonight it was live aid. The only excuse I have for ranting as much as I do is because I'm British Rachael aka a moany PMT filled bitter twisted bitch :) Anyways Shona wrote this hilarious (slightly bad taste) story thing about Mr Geldof which made me laugh loads so I thought I may spread the love. Geldof lovers beware - it's tongue in cheek. BOB GELDOF'S THOUGHT PROCESSES 1. Hmm feeling a bit bored today... 2. I miss being on the telly 3. I shall try to save the world again! 4. OOOHH poor folk on the telly 5. I shall help them! 6. I'm not giving them my fucking cash! 7. I'll get the commoners to cough up, I do have a knighthood after all 8. Where did I put the BBC's phone number? 9. Alright I'm on the telly 10. I'll get some other famous bastards in on the act-sharing's caring plus i can sit on my arse for a bit whilst they do some of the work. bono's always up for a laugh 11. Ok so got the march organised 12. Hmm Big brother's on..... 13. No! Back to the march! 14. So march is over, I've left the city in a shambles. 15. But hey I sold a few more copies of the Boomtown Rat's greatest hits 16. I'm off to hibernate until the next famine/drought/natural disaster.... THE END The moment a typhoon hits *phone rings at the Geldof's* "Dad there's been a natural disaster!" "WTF!? Let me get my coat it's time for liveaid!" BBC: "Yes Bob, we were expecting you" *Bob digs out live aid manual* "Well let's just re-hash the old idea we had, I can save some pennies.... LIVES! I mean I can save some lives!" BBC: Maybe we can fly you out to Africa for your live broadcast thsi time, Bob? Make it a bit more authentic? "Fuck off, we'll stick some trees in the back of the hotel suite. Oi Jimmy - find me a starving African, good lad!" *10 secs till we go live* "Right starving African, what's your name again? Zimbibli. Ok, I'm yer new adopted father alright, just hug me and look happy, ok!" *5 secs till we go live* "Gimme a bottle of Evian!" *pours into eyes* "3, 2, 1 We're live!" "the time has come again,my friends, for me to call upon your help. I believe I have been put on this earth for a reason (jimmy:"to fuck things up u mean?, bob:"shut yer arse!!!") "to help the people of the 3rd world, ppl like zimbibli,my new adopted son from a small village i helped rebuild with my bare hands in eritrea (bbc:"you've never been to eritrea bob......", bob:"shut the fuck up!!! they're eatin out my hand!") "so I appeal to you now,my friends,to join me,take my hand,unite with me and we shall tackle poverty together. by buying the boomtown rats greatest hits, you too can make a difference" *cuts to emaciated child* *cuts to sir Bob dancing through a field of flowers* "Help me make it a reality my friends, help them make it a reality" *cuts to boomtown rats video* THE END! post comment

End of the exams! [03 Jun 2005|06:53pm] So today I had my last exam, business management, I however am so stupid! It was one of those fold out papers and I was in a rush to get started so I just read the case study and then went on to the questions however I had folded it out wrong so I did the two essays in section 2 first (you can pick the 2 essays you prefer out of 5) So I ended up doing one of the hardest essays by accident, but I think I managed it okay it was all about implimenting decisions and strategical and tactical stuff in mcdonalds. Section 1 was nasty as well but manageable. Anyway that's the end of it all and exam talk is boring especially if it's BM. Vanessa was waiting for me outside which creeped me out and she started screaming about how someone had nicked her 60p bus fare and "are you not wondering why I have blood all down my arm" nonsense, no vanessa I couldn't care less.. So I had to endure a bus journey with her :( Where me, laura and jobie talked about stuff while she repeated everything I said. GRRRR!!! Damn her. People on the bus looked a bit alarmed by it all. I met this really sweet old man today and he was born in 1917 and was telling me all about himself - it was really nice and brightened up my view on the human race in a crazed round about way that two strangers could just have a nice friendly discussion - he was so lonely it made me really sad though, he knew he was going to die soon as well :( Back to the daily gring on monday can't wait, to get back to normality! That is all I have to glare at the neds outside my house ;) post comment

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